If you know me, you know how much I love cats.
If you don't know me, after reading this blog, you'll understand about the laughing coming from the above mentioned people...
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I'm not typically the kind of person who believes in bad luck, or any luck at all really... but last night, after coming home from a weekend trip to Bear Lake and finding out that a C-A-T had been living there, and when I say living...what I mean is uninvitedly wreaking havoc on my otherwise humble abode, I had ample reason to become one.
That's right. My next door neighbor's cat somehow spider-crawled her way into my bedroom before I left, got herself locked in, and continued to show her disapproval for having no litter box... no food... and no friends.
For three days.
She was however very pleased with the sleeping conditions...
Here is a list of reasons why I'm not so happy about any of this:
1. My sheets. Because now I'm going to have to burn them
2. My clothes, now contaminated with asphyxiating cat pee and cat poo
3. Being deprived of clean, non-urinated oxygen
4. Having a massive sudden loss of brain cells as a direct result of #3
5. The unfortunalaty of not owning a vacuum
I think it's pretty obvious which character I am in this story book. An ironically 6 foot tall goldfish who doesn't like cats... and never will, because, not unlike my aquatic friend the goldfish, my life is like a giant toilet bowl.
And it'd be fine if we just left it at that - but no. Now my life is like a giant toilet bowl surrounded by hungry pawing tomcats.Maybe Seuss should write a book about that.
Next week, I'm entering the make a wish foundation. Click here to donate.
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No animals were harmed during the making of this blog.
(Although I know a certain felonious feline who should have been)
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